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Comments : Two dyslexics run into a bank and shout, "air in the hands mother stickers...this is a f**k up!"




**not intended to offend people with this disability...just for kicks and giggles**

PostSubject: WTF?!   April 7th 2010, 7:31 pm

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ISN'T ENGLISH A FUNNY LANGUAGE ?

There is no egg in eggplant or ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine
in pineapple...

Is cheese the plural of choose?

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?

If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

In what language do people recite at a play, and play at a recital?

Ship by truck, and send cargo by ship?

Have noses that run and feet that smell?

Park on driveways and drive on parkways?



Sweetmeats are candies, while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are
meat.

We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find
that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square, and a guinea
pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write, but fingers don't fing, grocers don't
groce, and hammers don't ham?




If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth?
One goose, 2 geese. So, one moose, 2 meese?
One index, two indices?


How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another?

When a house burns up, it burns down.



You fill in a form by filling it out, and an alarm clock goes off by
going on.

When the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out,
they are invisible.

And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this
essay, I end it?

.English muffins were not invented in England or French fries in France.





How can 'slim chance and a fat chance' be the same, while ' wise man
and a wise guy' are opposites?





Now i know why i failed in english.


It's not my fault but the silly language doesn't quite know whether
it's coming or going

This was located on funny jokes/english_funny.htm

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